Dying with Debra

Hopefully A Long Running Series

February 13,2023

I didn’t write in my journal last night.

I had a 23 day streak going, but I didn’t write.

I’ve written through my whole journey so far. From diagnosis to treatment to treatment to treatment. But yesterday and last night…I didn’t write.

I didn’t write because I have been overwhelmed with despair. Despair is not an emotion that I want to welcome. I don’t want to name it. And I don’t want to share it.

but there it is.

I’m just tired of being in pain. I’m tired of days on end of getting through the hours and waiting for a better day. That’s the way it is now though. I trade bad days for good ones.

Just writing that makes me feel better. I hear your responses in my head encouraging me and sending your love. I’m okay. The dark clouds have blown over.

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6 responses to “February 13,2023”

  1. Aimi Avatar
    Aimi

    Praying for better days for you! More and more great days for you! Hugs

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  2. Elaine Ackel Zirkelbach Avatar
    Elaine Ackel Zirkelbach

    I wish I could ease your pain Deb.
    I pray everyday that God gives you peace, courage, strength and comfort. You are doing the best that you can in this battle and that’s enough. Every day has a new beginning.

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  3. Jo Avatar
    Jo

    Your continuing strength has been truly inspiring. You are certainly allowed to feel as you feel, on low days and high (!) days. So much love to you and peace inside. You do have a wonderful support system…you ARE important!

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  4. Mimi Avatar
    Mimi

    Sending love your way. I’m glad you reached out.

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  5. Karla Avatar
    Karla

    I wish I could ease your pain but I can’t. All I can do is tell you that you are in my thoughts and prayers

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  6. pamrebman Avatar
    pamrebman

    Sending love

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