I slept well but woke up feeling extremely weak again. ,  If I walk from one room to another, I have to sit down and rest and let my heart rate and breathing return to normal. It sucks so, I decided two things 

1. I will begin taking thrush medicine, so my natural immunities can work on other problems. 
2. I will experiment more with the medicines I have to help me feel stronger. I took a half of what Hans calls a cockroach’s poop size of RSO, remember, it’s the sticky wax mixture and had it on my French toast this morning. I feel much better and stronger.

I also just had most of a black bean burger and have been hydrating better, so could be that and it could be a combination. 

Said delicious burger was eaten at Pier 22, just across the bridge in Bradenton with my friend Sue Kolze who you’ve met in an earlier entry, our mutual friend, Carol Whitmore and my sister, Judith. Besides getting together socially, the purpose of the meeting was to introduce Judith, who is spearheading free mediation services to prevent evictions, to Carol, who champions homelessness solutions. Carol is just finishing up her time as a county commissioner and is looking to discover what’s next. Judith and Carol were able to find a lot of places where they can help each other. Gotta love networking 🙂 and Do-Gooders!

It’s always uplifting to be with people who are dedicated to making the world a better place    pictured above ..me, Carol Whitmore, Sue and Judith. 

Oh, by the way, I had another call from Dr Dineen ‘s nurse, Myra, about scheduling the surgery at Moffitt . I told her that I was sure that Dr Dineen had said the surgery was not an option She  took a look at the doctor’s notes Sure enough, he had recommended against surgery at this time and would see us after the scans are done after chemo. I’m informed by my friend who is a nurse that this kind of stuff happens all the time again ******another reason to be your best advocate

I was thinking about other songs that could be included in the aforementioned musical. I would love one delving into the statement.  “You can be strong and scared at the same time.” I asked Hans what he thought the take away from that statement is. He took awhile to answer. 

It’s easy to agree with the statement, “You can be strong and scared at the same time,” 

That said, If you deep dive on it, you realize that everyone has their own definition of what strong means as well as what scares them. 

Defining “strong “ naturally led us to a discussion about our individual definitions of heroism and bravery. Is there a difference between being a hero and being brave? Is it  situational?  

Hans served as a Green Beret and in the Dutch army, so his definitions relate to the military. I won’t go into the conversation further but it is an interesting topic. 

Bottom line, Hans feels that being scared is natural. Being strong is understanding and facing the fear. 

Being strong for me, is about doing all I can do with my life for as long as I can.  It is scary to lose physical and mental abilities. It will happen to all of us if we are lucky enough to get old. I want to do what I can do while I can do it. And I will constantly have to ADJUST.  That will take strength. 

Here’s another of my semi plagiaristic songs adapted for off, off, off Broadway.   Sung to the tune of “I am woman” by Helen Reddy.